When the World is Scary
- Ana Lewis
- 1 day ago
- 3 min read
The deadly shooting of Renee Nicole Good by ICE agents in Minneapolis yesterday has left our community mournful, bewildered, and angry. As we wake up the morning after this tragedy, my mind is recalling Kasserian Ingera’s message of “And how are the children?” Fear driving Minneapolis schools to close out of abundance of caution rings a loud signal that the children are not well today; thus demonstrating that peace, safety and social priorities for the care of children are not in place.
With frightening circumstances in our world today, especially as they affect our own families, neighborhoods, and communities, children often hear about them through the media, friends, or overheard conversations. As trusted adults and caregivers, our role isn’t to shelter children from reality, but to help them make sense of what they are hearing in a way that supports their emotional safety and resilience.
1. Begin by assessing what the child already knows
Before offering explanations, ask open-ended questions to determine what the child has heard, how much they understand, and what sources they’re using for information. This helps tailor the conversation to the child’s developmental level and correct any misunderstandings or misinformation.
2. Provide honest, age-appropriate explanations
Children do better when they hear facts in simple, clear terms that are appropriate for their age and cognitive level. Use language they understand and avoid graphic or frightening details. It’s okay to say “I don’t know” when you truly don’t have all the answers. Children are often sensitive to dishonesty and may become more distressed if they sense adults are not truthful.
3. Limit media and news exposure
Repeated or unsupervised exposure to news coverage and social media can heighten anxiety and confusion, especially in younger children. Monitoring and limiting their exposure to distressing images and repetitive news cycles helps reduce fixation on the event and lowers emotional stress.
4. Reassure children about safety and normalcy
After discussion of facts, reassure children about their safety and the safety measures in place (e.g., adults working to keep them safe, routines, community protections). Reinforcing predictable daily routines, such as regular meal and sleep schedules, can provide emotional stability and counter feelings of chaos or danger.
5. Listen actively and validate feelings
Encourage children to express their feelings and questions without minimizing their concerns. Validate their emotions (e.g., “I hear that this makes you feel scared; that makes sense”) and let them know it’s okay to feel worried. Remain calm in your own responses; children often mirror adult emotional reactions, so regulated and composed responses help model coping.
6. Normalize worry and offer ongoing dialogue
Let children know that it’s normal to feel upset or anxious about scary events, and that questions may come up repeatedly. Be prepared for follow-up conversations and allow space for repetition as children process and seek reassurance.
7. Teach media and news literacy gradually
Help older children and adolescents think critically about the sources of information they encounter, distinguish trustworthy reporting from rumors, and understand how media shapes perception. This supports both cognitive understanding and emotional control in the face of distressing news.
Additional Resources
Evidence Base & Rationale
Research and expert guidance emphasize that open, supportive conversations help children feel safer and more secure when processing scary world events, rather than avoiding or shielding them entirely
Limiting exposure to repeated violent or distressing images is associated with reduced anxiety in children and helps prevent over-fixation on the event
Validation and active listening are core components of trauma-informed communication and have been shown to support emotion regulation in children